The Adventures of Two Dumb Americans in Canada

May 2nd, 2008

Here are 10 reasons why The Good Asian Drivers Tour should have stayed a national tour:

10. We got held up for a good hour at Customs and Immigration at the Canadian border because we didn’t lie and say we were “tourists”.

9. Emily, our GPS, would not let us type in “No. 3 Road” no matter how hard we tried. 

8. At a Canadian TV studio while filming a segment of “Urban Rush” (which is the Today Show of Vancouver), two words in Kit’s poem “Queer Nation” got bleeped out. One was “fag”. The other was “cock”.

7. We couldn’t find food in Vancouver or Richmond that took credit card. We didn’t have any colorful Canadian currency. 

6. After driving around for almost an hour, we realized we could get cash from the ATM. What an idea.

5. We couldn’t figure out if it was customary to tip in Canada. (Kit said, “Don’t the French not tip?”)

4. We asked for good local Canadian beer at a Chinese restaurant. 

3. We looked around for a Bank of America.

2. Kit thought that “131.1″ at the gas station meant $131 per gallon.

1. When we crossed the border, Kit said, “Why is everyone driving 60 when it said 100?” 100 kilometers, Kit. Kilometers.

Blog

7 Responses to “The Adventures of Two Dumb Americans in Canada”

  1. 1 judy
    May 3rd, 2008 at 9:24 pm

    driving around looking for a bank of america in canada…

    so american.

  2. 2 Kelly G.
    May 4th, 2008 at 12:47 pm

    One of the last times I was in Canada I wanted a sandwich and I asked for American Cheese on it. Apparently in Canada that’s called “Pro-cessed Cheese.” The guy looked at me like I was a complete idiot. Oh well.

    We miss you guys, come back soon!
    <3 Kelly, Anastasia, Boris, and Gertie G.

    PS AVR wants to know if you now have a membership to the wetspot. Look out for two of my best friends at that show. :)

  3. 3 kristin
    May 4th, 2008 at 3:11 pm

    i thought the goal of this tour was to break stereotypes?

    don’t fail us now!

  4. 4 kit
    May 5th, 2008 at 8:09 pm

    We are getting the hang of Canada and are considering immigration.

    Yay friends at the show and I have no idea what wetspot is…

  5. 5 James DC
    May 8th, 2008 at 1:59 am

    Hey,
    tis James from Boston. number 3 and number 1 cracked me up!

  6. 6 kit
    May 8th, 2008 at 3:51 pm

    BTW, AVR.

    We toured the wetspot which I now know is the nickname for the center and went to a party for fifteen minutes or so.

    I wish I could have stayed that place was amazing and I really wanted to come back for a party :(

    Perhaps next time on tour in Seattle.

  7. 7 Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha
    May 20th, 2008 at 2:18 am

    This cracked me up so bad. If you guys want to immigrate, I’m single and gay marriage is legal! We’d just have to wait for them to legalize polyamory in marriage.

Leave a Reply